July 27, 2002

  • Here’s a tip for when you’re buying frozen pizza:

    Freschetta advertises itself as having crust that rises when you cook it. This is true; it actually does rise when you cook it. But the reason it rises when you cook it is that IT’S BISCUIT DOUGH. It’s like opening a package of frozen biscuits, making a pizza-shaped crust out of it, and putting some toppings on.

    And it’s naaaasty.

    Here is their marketing web site, called ‘LIFESTYLE By Freschetta.’ Yeah, the lifestyle of someone who likes to eat 8-inch biscuits!

Comments (6)

  • Echhh:

    Earlier today I nabbed a bite of Domino’s Pizza Cheezy-Stuffed Crust Things from a guy on the street while I practiced my stilts around the lake.

    It was I C K Y !!!! How the FUCK do people call that food? Much less Pizza. It was indeed, much like biscuit dough, but with microwaved vaseline inside masquerading as cheese.

    And of course, FOOD RELEASE.

    Y U M ! !

  • Hmmm. Are you sure? I’ve never had a Freschetta’s pizza, but I do know a thing or two about dough. Biscuit dough uses baking powder and results in a flaky texture. Pizza dough uses yeast and has (or should have) a texture like — pizza crust! Bready rather than flakey. But who knows what hybrid monstrosities are being perpetrated in the name of food?

    I’ve noticed lately that grocery ads show less and less real food and offer fewer cents off coupons for the real thing. It would make an interesting study — how much of the average diet consists of real food (or as close as you can get to it these days.)

  • That’s why I stick to Pizza Hut.

    Not because I used to *work* there, or anything.

  • Pizza in North America in basically “CHEESE CAKE”, in my humble opinion. Give me a thin-crust pizza with fresh tomatoes, fresh mozarella, and whole basil leaves ANY DAY over the inch-thick, biscuit-crust, pound-of-cheese, mound-of-greasy-meat PIE.

    Eww.

  • I know how you feel. That Pillsbury poppin’fresh flavor gets old very quickly.

  • with a name like “freschetta” what can you expect. i mean it’s a downright giggly name for food. =O)

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