April 23, 2003
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I eat out a lot. More than most people, I’d guess. I’ve ‘blogged about it before, with the stories about going to drive-thrus.
I haven’t been going to drive-thrus much lately, since that was mainly an excuse to get out of the house, and now I have a whole house to myself.
What I want to write about now is restaurants.
Sometimes I go to restaurants alone. I’m a loner, and I eat out, so I eat out alone. I go to the ‘please wait to be seated’ sign, and some perky kid breathlessly grabs a menu and says, “Seating for one?”
“Yes.”
“Would you like to sit at our bar?”
“No, thanks.”
A look comes over his or her face. It’s the look that dreads having to decide which waitstaff will be saddled with the lonely guy. The look is usually well-disguised, but I can see it. It’s there.
He takes me over to a table for 10 by the bathroom. “Jodi will be your waitress, and she’ll be with you in just a second.”
“Actually, I was hoping to be in a booth over by the window.” I motion toward the five empty booths by the windows.
Just for the briefest second, he registers a scowl. I appreciate the honesty, because the fake smile comes back. “Ok. Right this way.”
I’m not creating this stress for him. He’s doing it himself. No one wants to sit alone at a giant table and watch people come and go from the bathroom.
He seats me. “Jodi won’t be serving you, it’ll be Melissa. Enjoy your meal.”
I look over the menu. I wait. I wait some more. I wait more and finally someone wearing a nametag that says ‘Juli’ comes and takes my drink order. ‘Juli’ comes back with my coffee and asks, “Are you ready to order now?”
“Yes. I want the two eggs over medium with the english muffins and some bacon. Could you…”
“You like your eggs over medium, you said?”
“Yes. And crispy bacon.”
“Ok. We’ll get that for you right away.”
She turns away and the other waitstaff are looking at her face and trying not to laugh.
Couple days ago I went alone to a place called Zao. It’s a sort of pan-Asian noodle fusion place. Mostly overpriced, but not bad. I had three separate waiters. The first one was cute while she was taking my drink order, but apparently she had better things to do, so someone else brought me my drink and took my food order, and then a third person brought the food and would come around from time to time and ask if things were OK.
Now, there are plenty of reasons why this might happen, but all three waiters were there the whole time, and there were only three other tables to wait on!
The fear, of course, is that people who dine alone don’t tip. You bust your butt for some loser loner who’s such a perfectionist that they can’t keep friends, and then you get a whole penny in tippage. Not worth it.
But I always tip. I’ve worked foodservice; I know what it means. And if you give me lousy service, I tip lousy. So if I’m alone, it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy on the part of the waiter.
I don’t want you to be my friend, I just don’t want to be relegated to some customer service backwater. And if you’re going to flirt with me like that first waitress did at Zao, you better come back and flirt some more or I’ll end up crying into my salmon and shrimp over thick rice noodles with yellow curry.
Comments (6)
That’s a lot of cojones…I’ve only eaten out by myself a few times and that was back in high school.
One is the loneliest number. Or the most relaxing.
I used to dine out alone once in a while (mostly on business trips) and was never! treated like that. and I dress like a slacker so one good look at me would give good indication that I’m a lousy tipper…though I’m actually an unreasonably good tipper. I never leave less than 10% even if the server spits in my food. Most of the time it’s 20% and if they really make me happy I’ve been known to leave 40%.
Hmmm… Rude watestaff no good.
I’d say 75% of my dining out is done alone. I don’t generally care one way or the other about where I sit or how many staff are involved in getting me my food, as long as I get served seemingly as well as everyone else in the place and I’m sitting by the dumpster.
I actually enjoy my eating out alone-time, lets clear my thoughts.
As for tips, I’m one of these people who only tip when I think it’s deserved. Just taking my order and bringing me my food and check are not tip-worthy. But I probably tip between 25% to 40% if the server is really going above and beyond. On the other hand I don’t get bent out of shape when they make mistakes or things go wrong. I’ve seen some customers just be unreasonably obnoxious over simple errors or mistakes. I remember one poor server was on her first day on the job and it was in the middle of lunch rush, and you could see everything was just going to shit for the girl. She was dealing with a big family at a table next to me where everyone was trying give their order at once and kept changing their mind over and over. The order got mixed up and they were taking it out on the server just being really obnoxious in that “I’m the customer, you will worship me” kinda way. I could tell she was really trying hard but she was just having one of those days so I left her a $10 tip on a $8 order.
That’s one reason I would never be able to own/manage a restaruant. I would have given that family their money back and told them to leave and come back when they joined the human race. The urge to walk over and just slap the face off the mom & dad was almost overwhelming. ARGG!!! Makes my blood boil just thinking about it again. hehe
Oops…
Hmmm… Rude watestaff no good.
I’d say 75% of my dining out is done alone. I don’t generally care one way or the other about where I sit or how many staff are involved in getting me my food, as long as I get served seemingly as well as everyone else in the place and I’m sitting by the dumpster.
I actually enjoy my eating out alone-time, lets clear my thoughts.
As for tips, I’m one of these people who only tip when I think it’s deserved. Just taking my order and bringing me my food and check are not tip-worthy. But I probably tip between 25% to 40% if the server is really going above and beyond. On the other hand I don’t get bent out of shape when they make mistakes or things go wrong. I’ve seen some customers just be unreasonably obnoxious over simple errors or mistakes. I remember one poor server was on her first day on the job and it was in the middle of lunch rush, and you could see everything was just going to shit for the girl. She was dealing with a big family at a table next to me where everyone was trying give their order at once and kept changing their mind over and over. The order got mixed up and they were taking it out on the server just being really obnoxious in that “I’m the customer, you will worship me” kinda way. I could tell she was really trying hard but she was just having one of those days so I left her a $10 tip on a $8 order.
That’s one reason I would never be able to own/manage a restaruant. I would have given that family their money back and told them to leave and come back when they joined the human race. The urge to walk over and just slap the face off the mom & dad was almost overwhelming. ARGG!!! Makes my blood boil just thinking about it again. hehe
it reads like you’re blaming other people’s bad behavior on yourself, as if there was a sign on your forehead you can’t see, or something.
when someone is rude, its them, not you, that’s the issue. try not to take it personally. that gives them far too much power over your identity.
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